Thanks, Evil-Doers!

While going through my voice recorder that serves as handheld backup memory (hey - sometimes when I get a fleeting thought, important or otherwise, I had better capture it somewhere before it goes fleeting elsewhere!), I found an old blog idea as follows: "were I King of the World, eliminate all carry-on baggage on airlines," dictated following yet another frustrating travel experience in mid-July in which many patrons feel it is their birthright and a requirement to inconvenience every other passenger on the plane by carrying on all of their worldly possessions and then taking their sweet time unloading their carry-on from the overhead bins (generally, not the bin over their seats). Indeed, were I King, airline boarding and de-boarding would be a much more pleasant experience, as everyone would simply walk into the airplane, free of such luggage encumbrances, quickly sit in his or her seat, and de-board in a similar fashion.

But our Great-Satan-hating friends, the Terrorists (in Bushspeak: "Turrists"), have solved the problem for us! Recently-uncovered plots against trans-Atlantic flights have resulted in a sweeping ban against certain items, generally liquids that most folks carry in their overnight kits in their massive carry-on luggage, which will hopefully eliminate a great deal of this luggage. So as long as the flight attendants keep a steady stream of bottled water coming so that we don't die of dehydration on the plane, this King of the Infidels has one thing to say to Terror: thanks!